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Kyle Smith (Twitter: @rkylesmith) is critic-at-large for National Review, theater critic for The New Criterion and the author of the novels Love Monkey and A Christmas Caroline. Type a title in the box above to locate a review.

Buy Love Monkey for $4! "Hilarious"--Maslin, NY Times. "Exceedingly readable and wickedly funny romantic comedy"--S.F. Chronicle. "Loud and brash, a helluva lot of fun"--Entertainment Weekly. "Engaging romp, laugh-out-loud funny"-CNN. "Shrewd, self-deprecating, oh-so-witty. Smith's ruthless humor knows no bounds"--NPR

Buy A Christmas Caroline for $10! "for those who prefer their sentimentality seasoned with a dash of cynical wit. A quick, enjoyable read...straight out of Devil Wears Prada"--The Wall Street Journal

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    Britain Should Apologize for America

    By kyle | April 13, 2011

    As David Cameron told Pakistan that its current balls-out craziness was actually the fault of the British empire, experts pointed to the giant, stupid, disgusting country founded by some people from East Anglia.

    Julian Cook, author of America: What the F**k Were We Thinking?, said: “When Harwich-born Christopher Jones captained the Mayflower in 1620 he began a process that would lead ultimately to genocide, the Ku Klux Klan and Grey’s Anatomy.

    “Thanks to him and his insane passengers, the way was paved for a nation of heavily armed toddlers led around by an ever-changing roll-call of religious maniacs, grubby conmen and dead-eyed celebrities.

    “It doesn’t understand anything more than 15 minutes old – except creationism – and is littered with strip malls and heavily branded cheese pumps.

    From the humor site The Daily Mash.

    Yes, I have had it with David Cameron, the anti-Churchill. I apologize for ever expressing any hope for this awful man.

    Topics: Europe, Politics | 5 Comments »

    5 Responses to “Britain Should Apologize for America”

    1. Anwyn Says:
      April 13th, 2011 at 4:43 pm

      So … the Daily Mash was not being serious, then? Because it didn’t sound too farfetched for somebody to write that.

    2. Hunter Tremayne Says:
      April 14th, 2011 at 12:40 am

      Humor is always more effective if there’s some truth behind it.

    3. K Says:
      April 14th, 2011 at 10:17 am

      We can all agree that the Brits are responsible for the entire world mess, but who was responsible for the Brits?

      I say it’s all the Roman’s fault.

    4. JohnFNWayne Says:
      April 14th, 2011 at 11:13 am

      Somehow our esteem in the minds of our cross-oceanic cousins rises when there is a Hitler or Soviet Union to consider – less so when there isn’t.

    5. Ped Says:
      June 24th, 2012 at 8:44 pm

      Only americans think america great. The rest of the world thank god we were’nt born. A place where they shoot their leaders and still cry for rights to be armed. America should have national pacific and atlantic days to honour the bodies of water that separated them from real wars all this time. Else germany would have rolled then flat in a couple of weeks. If it wasnt for us vrits you’d all be speaking spanish or french