« Interview: Wes Anderson | Home | American Innovation Will Save America »
Wifebeater Newscaster Sentenced to Reading About Matt Damon
By Kyle | January 15, 2010
New York 1 Newscaster Dominic Carter was sentenced by a New York judge to 30 days in prison for beating, choking and kicking his wife. The cruel and unusual part: The judge also made him read an article about the humility of . . .Mahatma Gandhi? Abraham Lincoln? No, Matt Damon. Says the Post, which probably should have published this article under News of the Weird:
[Judge] Etelson also gave Carter a photocopy of a New York magazine article about Matt Damon that cited the actor’s views on honesty and humility. The judge noted that Carter had egotistically dropped the names of politician-friends during prior court proceedings, and bragged to cops about being written up in The New York Times.
“You are equal to everyone,” Etelson said. “Try some humility and honesty — it goes a long way.”
Thanks, judge, but could I have a year in Attica instead? I mean, whatever happened to all those promises about torture being removed from the justice system? And yes, mentally I do pronounce the words “Matt Damon” the way they were pronounced in “Team America: World Police.”
Read more: http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/crying_shame_of_jailed_ny_journo_GooUI4d4ZWXganGrurKbrK#ixzz0cjWIXxQS
January 16th, 2010 at 10:03 pm
… and how can we find that New York Magazine article about Matt Damon’s ‘humility and honesty’ … ?
January 16th, 2010 at 10:42 pm
Maaat Daaaaaamon, the misogynist, who wouldn’t trust a woman to be Vice President lest she have pms? The same guy who married a woman with a child already because he knew she could conceive, and thinks his wife needs guidance in raising their children because she was only a bartender? Way to go judge.
January 17th, 2010 at 9:17 am
I’d rather be urineboarded…
January 18th, 2010 at 11:35 am
Never thought I’d pity a wife-beater.