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Kyle Smith (Twitter: @rkylesmith) is critic-at-large for National Review, theater critic for The New Criterion and the author of the novels Love Monkey and A Christmas Caroline. Type a title in the box above to locate a review.

Buy Love Monkey for $4! "Hilarious"--Maslin, NY Times. "Exceedingly readable and wickedly funny romantic comedy"--S.F. Chronicle. "Loud and brash, a helluva lot of fun"--Entertainment Weekly. "Engaging romp, laugh-out-loud funny"-CNN. "Shrewd, self-deprecating, oh-so-witty. Smith's ruthless humor knows no bounds"--NPR

Buy A Christmas Caroline for $10! "for those who prefer their sentimentality seasoned with a dash of cynical wit. A quick, enjoyable read...straight out of Devil Wears Prada"--The Wall Street Journal

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    The Greatest Food in Human History

    By kyle | July 29, 2013

    …is available on a corner near you for a buck or so. More in my Sunday column, which has generated more than 7000 Facebook Likes.

    UPDATE: The Daily Mail picked up the story and even credited me and (!) ran a picture of me.
    I have no memory of this picture whatsoever. Must have been years ago.

    UPDATE 2: This appears to be the most widely-read piece of mine I’ve ever published. It has over 21,000 Likes.

    Topics: Food | 20 Comments »

    20 Responses to “The Greatest Food in Human History”

    1. Anwyn Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 11:50 am

      I thought about this just a couple weeks ago when driving through McDonald’s for a fast breakfast. They sold me around 800 calories for $2. I’m thinking McDonald’s actually keeps poor people alive, unlike the @#%^$#@s at our illustrious gov’t who are throwing out food donated to shelters and food pantries.

    2. Jon Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 3:58 pm

      Did you then actually use your brain? Caloric intake alone is not a full picture of a foods nutritional value.. in fact the laundry lists of the McDoubles other features are a MUCH bigger driver of medical issues for the poor than “not eating enough calories”

    3. Bill Cochran Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 4:38 pm

      Sorry Kyle, but the McDouble (as lousy a sandwich as it is!) does not have 850 grams of sodium. That would be one pound and fourteen ounces of salt.

    4. Kyle Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 6:31 pm

      When did I say it had 850 grams of sodium?

    5. Joe Schmo Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 6:32 pm

      lol this actually made me laugh. How can you say a double cheeseburger is more nutritious than say lentils and brown rice. This is such an opinionated piece its very hard to take seriously. I’d like to ask an professional, phd’ed, food scientist and see what they say.

    6. Anwyn Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 7:08 pm

      Jon, oh really, caloric intake alone doesn’t tell me anything about the nutritional value of food? Thanks, I’m glad you’re here to tell me these things, jerk.

      I didn’t make any claims about nutritional value, nor did I ever say a word about the medical problems of the poor. I’m talking specifically and only about people so poor they can barely afford to eat, and that cheap calories can actually keep them alive.

      Don’t be such a preachy know-it-all.

    7. James Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 8:06 pm

      This is absolutely ridiculous. The McDouble is not even food; it is processed biproducts and filled with chemicals. The claims in this article are terrible and misleading.

      Food like this is poisoning the poor, not keeping them alive.

    8. kishke Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 9:04 pm

      Lentils and brown rice are fart food, which is one reason to avoid crunchy granola types.

    9. Union Jack Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 9:34 pm

      some of mr Smith’s best fiction yet

      he cant possibly believe what he’s writing

      but most people know that already

      this one’s much better fiction than caroline

    10. kishke Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 11:17 pm

      Not fiction at all. A cheeseburger is low in carbs; high in fat and protein. The perfect food.

    11. kishke Says:
      July 29th, 2013 at 11:19 pm

      Why so grumpy-looking in the DM photo?

    12. James Says:
      July 30th, 2013 at 6:07 am

      Congrats. You made an outrageous, asinine statement and now a bunch of people who’ve never heard of you are paying attention to you. That was the point, right?

    13. Kyle Says:
      July 30th, 2013 at 8:26 am

      Kishke: As a public service, I never smile. (Bad teeth)

    14. lh Says:
      July 30th, 2013 at 1:43 pm

      I think the point can be found at the top of the page… in the quote from Kingsley Amis.

      And while I just finished a kale and green apple smoothie (with flax and chia seeds, yum) I appreciate your point that others can be properly yet inexpensively nourished eating their McDonalds burger. Not all of us farmer’s market foodies are douchebags.

    15. sherm Says:
      July 31st, 2013 at 9:58 pm

      Bravo KS and bon appetit. Just finished a wonderful egg-white mcmuffin for about $2. low fat low chol high protein. and all the veggie eaters conveniently always forget to remember that McDi’s serves great salads.

    16. Don Reed Says:
      July 31st, 2013 at 10:06 pm

      Has anyone else noticed that the redo of the NY Daily News website is a virtual clone of the Daily Mail (UK)?

    17. Kyle Says:
      August 1st, 2013 at 3:41 pm

      yes, everyone has noticed that. The Daily Mail has an awesome site that is much admired.

    18. Union Jack Says:
      August 2nd, 2013 at 12:27 pm

      rising health costs on path to make amurrica = detroit (rip)

      3/4 health probs preventable—fatties smokers no exercise etc

      the poorer the fatter

      answer—mcdoubles for all

      good plan—make amurrica implode from w/in

    19. Don Reed Says:
      August 2nd, 2013 at 7:31 pm

      So what’s so bad about one pound and 14 ounces of salt in a cheeseburger?

      Just add a pound or two of sugar and it evens out very nicely.

    20. Don Reed Says:
      August 2nd, 2013 at 7:37 pm

      Kyle, actually, NYDN could have gone with the Rumson Meteor (Maine) format, which requires an original sense of humor (bigger dividends for the readers). Surely one person in NYC could have figured it out.

      Plus the Baltimore Sun for the crime section/police blotter. With 138 DOAs so far this year, they’re not so preoccupied with the salt intake at MD’s.